You may have noticed that I've been absent (who am I kidding? I believe only one other person reads this blog. I got my first comment!)--Arianna started having these deep contractions soon after I wrote that last entry and she gave birth to a boy, Beckett, yesterday.
On Thursday night, I got a call around one in the morning from the hospital. She had been having Braxton-Hicks contractions for days, but by night time, the contractions had become painful and close-together so she took a cab to the hospital. They checked her into labour and delivery after they made her wait in the emergency room until morning. It really really sucked.
They were able to give her some drugs to help his lungs mature and they kept him in until Monday. And then they decided for whatever reason that he'd actually do better outside her body rather than inside her body so they let her dilate and she gave birth early Monday morning.
I have to admit that I was really worried to be in the delivery room. I mean, I knew I could do the coaching stuff and rub her back and bring her ice chips. I could do the head stroking and the encouragement and holding the tissue box while she cried. All that was perfectly manageable.
But I was freaked as all get out to see the baby come out.
I tried to position myself by her head while she was pushing and then this...almost animal-like desire to actually witness Beckett's entrance into the world overtook me and I found myself holding one of her knees so I could watch him emerge. Was it disgusting in retrospect? Sure, he was covered in blood and this waxy stuff and I almost vomited when I saw the placenta (truly, I don't think I will ever be able to cook meat). But in the moment, I was sobbing with Arianna and cheering her on and giving her updates and...I fell in love. I honestly fell in love with him when I saw him.
And it breaks my heart as I write that because I'm not his mother. I'm his auntie. And I'm so glad I got to be there for the most amazing moment of all time.
Arianna is still in the hospital. Her blood pressure was high so they're keeping her for a few nights. Beckett is in the NICU because he's tiny. He's smaller than they thought he would be--I think he's about 4 pounds? I wrote it down somewhere and now I can't find the paper. They're having some issues with feeding and he's jaundiced so they have to keep him under these special lights.
Welcome to the world, Beckett. I cannot wait to teach you how to blanch carrots and chop onions. Perhaps by the time you're old enough to cook, I will have mastered the souffle!
Who Am I?
Rachel Goldman is finding it very difficult to answer this simple question. Divorce does that to you. As does trying to master clarifying butter the same evening you start a blog. In brief, I am a 34-year-old, newly single woman in Manhattan, trying to teach myself how to cook while keeping all of my fingers.Email me: rachelgoldman274@gmail.com.
3 comments:
Hi! I found your blog through Mel's Stirrup Queens and I have to say I'm loving it. I think it doesn't matter what difficult situation we find ourselves in life, we really just want to know that someone out there is there to listen. Welcome to the blogging world.
Oh, and I think Auntie Rachel is going to have some fabulous cooking lessons to share. :)
I am a sucker for all things cooking related, and as it turns out, all birth stories as well. I found you through Alice Q. Foodie. I'm intrigued by your story and your writing....
I too found you through Stirrup Queens and just wanted to let you know that people are reading. Congratulations on the new arrival, he sounds perfect and you sound like you will be a fabulous auntie!
Post a Comment